Avoiding weak-ass networks
The coupon you never use has no cash value.
Confucius, probably
Your professional relationships aren’t great because you’re friends with everyone you work with. That’s socializing.
Professional relationships turn skills & connections into value & growth. Value transfer is clear and undeniable.
You got them that job.
They got you that raise.
You fought together in the trenches for a company-shaping win.
Weak relationships are one-sided. Important people who wont use their juice to help you. People who move on and leave you behind. Maybe you’ll become important enough to them, but don’t hold your breath.
They have no skin in the game.
Strong relationships are:
- Balanced
- Collaborative
- Open
Weak relationships are:
- One-sided
- Secretive
- Status-based
When evaluating the value of a relationship, people become too fixated on the level of power and “potential” that they never actually use. Rubbing elbows with powerful people who view you as disposable is a great way to end up in the same hole forever.
Do you have relationships with super important people? Perhaps a few dozen on LinkedIn? How many of them have gone to bat for you? Or pushed your income up a bracket or two with their powerful voices?
Sort your relationships by return on time invested. You may find that the C-level executive who never promotes you is worth less than the Senior Director who is willing to take a risk to give you a shot.
To actually develop stronger relationships, focus on giving and also asking for what you need. The point isn’t to be a pest to your relationship partner, but to make them a participant in their success. Set them up to be a hero in your narrative in the way that you want to be a supporting character in theirs.
Be smart:
Sharon, I’d really like to share a tool I made with you. It will cut the time your team spends on this process in half. If you find it valuable, you could support my growth by promoting it to a few other departments. If you don’t find it valuable, I’d like your candid feedback so I can go make some modifications to make it better.
Smarty #1
Can you find 45 minutes to give this a try?
Don’t be dumb:
Sharon, let’s grab coffee! You seem like a great mentor with awesome experience and I aspire to be just like you some day! It’s amazing how you got all the way up to C-level! Would love to see if you are open to mentoring me!!!!1
Idiot #1
Avoid the hype of selfish assholes. If important people aren’t pulling you into their orbit, land your ship elsewhere. Grow relationships at any level that take you where you’re going.
Use your time to invest in people who can move the needle. Give freely and ask for what you need up front.
